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How to Regulate Your Emotions

 

Emotions are an integral part of life; we experience emotions daily. Emotions could be positive or negative depending upon the situation. Exhaustion, stress, or illness may arise negative emotions such as anger, aggression, and sadness. Similarly, we feel happy about passing exams, buying our favorite things, job promotions, and meeting with friends and family. All these are natural experiences and it is very important to stabilize these emotions. However, sometimes we feel overwhelmed and respond in unreasonable ways and later regret it as our response affects our relations (1).


How to regulate your emotions

Emotional regulation 

It refers to balancing our emotions and using them in a favorable way. It involves thinking and reflecting upon the situation and trying to calm down. It helps to avoid situations that later lead to regret, depression, and frustration.

Emotional regulation theory

The most acceptable theory of emotional regulation is the process model, which has four components.

How to regulate your emotions; process model

1.  Situation: Emotional cycle starts in a situation that could be internal or external. When you imagine a scenario in your mind it is an internal situation whereas an external situation could be a harsh comment from a colleague.

Attention: Then you pay attention to the situation such as you noticed that your colleague is in an aggressive mood.

Appraisal: You interpret the situation and think that you have made some mistake or your colleague had an argument with the boss.

Response: The above sequence of events may trigger you and you will respond in one of the following ways a) go away from the situation b) tell your colleague that his behavior hurt you c) talk to him aggressively (2).

 The emotions could be regulated in all these stages. Emotional regulation is a basic life skill that needs to be mastered. A few steps are described here to learn emotional regulation. 

1. Recognition

First of all, recognize that you are experiencing an emotional response and understand what kind of response it is either negative or positive.

2. Acceptance

Accepting the emotional response is an important step towards self-control and self-healing. Even if your emotions are negative, such as feeling angry after fighting with your friend or distressed as your child broke the favorite vase, accept your feelings rather than rejecting or suppressing them.

3. Management

Once you have recognized and accepted your emotions try to manage them by implementing an effective strategy (3).

Various strategies are used to cope with emotional dysregulation, however, be 

mindful in choosing the coping strategy because some strategies could be 

unhealthy.

Healthy emotional regulation strategies

1.   Speak out to your friend

 Exercise

 Meditate

 Write about your feelings

 Read a good book

 Get adequate sleep

 Eat dessert or your favorite meal as it activates the reward system

 Take a break from an exhaustive routine

 Take good care of yourself if suffering from some disease

 Check your negative thoughts before an emotional outburst

S    Seek therapy if the above strategies do not work for you (1). 

6.   Unhealthy emotional regulation strategies

1.    Use of alcohol or other harmful substances

2.    Self-harm

3.    Abuse others both verbally and physically

4.    Escaping tough situations

5.    Wasting time and money (1).

 Conclusion

We all experience emotions that could be negative or positive. People often try to regulate their emotional response however, sometimes failed due to being unaware of the proper management strategies. Adopting healthy coping strategies is very important to create an emotional balance.

 References

1.http://www.selfinjury.bctr.cornell.edu/perch/resources/what-is-emotion-regulationsinfo-brief.pdf

2.https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2016.01373/full

3.https://www.verywellmind.com/emotion-regulation-skills-training-425374#citation-4


 







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